My insecurities are eating me up inside. I hate who I am and I don’t think I will EVER be comfortable in my own skin. How much I care sickens me every time I realize it. And how much I let people walk over me cause of the big heart I have I need to no longer allow. I get attached so easily. This is when the depression and the anxiety start to kick in again. Whenever I open up to someone it turns into shit. Never will I ever open up to anyone ever again. Just to feel like someone ripped out my heart cut it open then stomped on it. How I yearn for the blade to cut open my skin again, but how I contemplate it every time cause I think about how others will feel never how much relief I will feel. Eating has become sort of a chore now. But this is no surprise, just another one of those nights.